Three cat cafes opened in New York City this past year. Purrfect! Not a single one is called “Mew York”. Are you “kitten” me?
However disappointed I was by the brilliant pun going to waste, I was still excited to pay a visit to Meow Parlour. Not only is Meow Parlour New York’s premier cat cafe, it was the second permanent cat cafe to open in America. It opened in December 2014.
Winter 2016, it got me. I succumbed. The blight that affects what? Three out of every four New Yorkers? 9 in 10? The 99%? I’m talking about HIBERNATION. We live in the greatest city in the world and suddenly want to spend as little time outside our shoe-box apartments as possible! It’s too cold! Seamless exists! Netflix is my new hobby!
But all that’s changing. It’s March! Sure, it’s supposed to snow this weekend, but even so New Yorkers every where are poking their heads out of their take-out box/blanket-fort caves. Lured by the smell of Cadbury eggs and sangria? Perhaps. It officially turns spring in March! Only 17 more days!
So your friend invited you to his show in Greenpoint/Williamsburg/Bushwick. You liked his band’s page on Facebook, you even downloaded one of their songs on iTunes, but you’ve strategically avoided actually showing up at any of his live shows. Now it’s the sloggy part of winter, you made the mistake of bitching on social media about your lack of plans, and he has finally guilted you into attending his next show at Shea Stadium/Union Pool/Pete’s Candy Store.
Here’s the good news: just because the cover art for his demo CD is awful doesn’t mean his music will be. You can find sweet music playing any night of the week, all over Brooklyn. Rad new music pops up all the time, who knows, your friend could be tomorrow’s New Music Tuesday feature on Brokelyn.
The bad news: his band might be every bit as cliché as they look in their Bandcamp cover pic.
If they are the opening band of the night, you may very well be one of only six people in the audience. The music does nothing for you but create a ringing in your ears. You can’t understand a single one of the lyrics. The band’s front man has the stage presence of an accountant from Ohio.
You’re standing in the back room of a bar feeling mad awkward. Every fiber of your being wants to leave, flee to the L train and pretend this never happened. But you’re not an asshole, you’ve come this far. You’re going to stick it out and support your friend damn it!
Never fear, New York Cliché is here to save your night and make it a whole lot more fun! When you find yourself in the above predicament, I’ve got just the game for you!
WARNING #1: Playing this scavenger hunt as a drinking game will likely end in alcohol poisoning and/or death. MODIFY AT YOUR OWN RISK. That said, drinking will make a shitty music experience a whole lot more fun!
WARNING #2: Be careful who you share this game with. The cliché Hipster takes themselves very seriously and may find absolutely no humor in this game. A pity, but all the more reason to play, I say!
Ghosting. My least favorite thing about dating in 2016. What was once widely regarded as unacceptable behavior is now the norm. Don’t want to see someone anymore? Just cut off all communication and ignore them! Pretend they don’t exist! UGH.
(Unfamiliar with “ghosting”? Read this blog.)
I understand this after one date, or two. There should be no expectations after that, you don’t really know each other, you’re hardly part of each others lives. Fine.
But when a guy I’d been dating for 2 months- a guy who had claimed “crazy about” me, who had introduced me to his friends, who had begged me to hang out with him every weekend, who had told me who wasn’t interested in dating other people, who texted me “good night” every single night of those TWO MONTHS- when he started ignoring my texts I just….I couldn’t believe it.
Hey guys, it’s cool. I’m cool. The floppy maroon hat on my head is one most people can’t pull off but I totally make it look cool. My hair has messy-perfect waves that make it just-rolled-out-of-bed cool. I’m sitting in a coffee shop in the West Village, pleading my Cool Case on my MacBook Air (too cool for an iPad, duh). In an hour I’ll be off to a concert in a penthouse venue in Chelsea. I’m on the press list. Whatever, NBD, just cool.
I’ve been surrounded by red and pink, chocolate and flowers all week. If you are not acutely aware that Valentine’s Day is this weekend, then you are truly #blessed.
So how do we feel about this holiday? Left Mary Lane or Right Mary Lane?
Oh Valentine’s Day. I’ve written too many blogs about you from a single perspective. What more is there to say? I’d love to mix it up with a OMG I HAVE A VALENTINE post. That’s just the sort of plot twist this blog needs. Read More
Eduardo Kobra’s gorgeous mural celebrated one of the most iconic NYC photographs of all time, the 1945 photograph “V-J Day In Times Square” of the kissing sailor and nurse.
The mural burst with color. Read More
