Winter 2015, We Are Never, Ever Getting Back Together

Guys! Guys!! I have some really exciting news! It’s a big, big day!

Y’all ready for this?

I just walked outside, and I didn’t want to die! My nose hairs didn’t freeze! I didn’t wince when the air touched me exposed skin! My hands didntn’t clenched into tiny fists in an attempt to conserve heat! Can you believe it?

Wait. It gets better.

I wasn’t wearing a puffy coat. I know. I was wearing my cute red wool coat and, wait for it, I DIDN’T EVEN BUTTON IT.

Guys, I’m not even wearing long underwear! That’s how serious this is! I’m not even wearing pants! I’m wearing a dress and only one pair of tights! I can hardly believe it! I dreamed of this day for MONTHS!


Now that we’re finally here, finally there isn’t a single day with snow showing on the 10 day forecast, I can look back on the snow with more than the gut feeling: I HATE IT! I HATE IT! I HATE IT! Sounds similar to the experience of child birth. Perhaps better to compare to the end of high school. You look at the picture sideshow at the prom and forget how depressed you were for most of it. You dream of what lies ahead in this new chapter of life when you’re not shackled by the one pair of snow boots you own and strangled by perfunctory scarves!

Good bye, winter. It was nice knowing you (at least in December). Hopefully I’ll be excited the next time it snows. Once my chapped lips become supple again and the cracks on my dry hands heal, maybe I’ll even remember you fondly. I mean, you sure look good in pictures.

Every relationship I ever ended, I broke the news on a walk. Walks are good for good byes I guess. Last weekend, I went for a walk in winter, to say good bye. Winter, I think you’re great but, YOU’RE TOO FUCKING COLD.

My Break Up Walk With Winter, Central Park

The San Remo winter

The San Remo, the most iconic building on the west side of the park. Look at those joggers in the snow. Crazy people.


This is the same lake in I went boating on (remember?)! It’s completely frozen over!

lake central park foot prints

It is so frozen idiots decide it’s a good idea to walk on it. The proof is in the foot prints!


That ladder in back of me? That’s if you’re dumb enough to walk on the lake, fall in, and need some one to fish you out. Also I PRAY I don’t wear this stupid puffy coat again this year!


Rose petals in the snow by the lake. I wonder is someone got married here? What big, romantic gesture did I miss?


Iconic Central Park Winter. That poor horse must be so cold.


Snow blanketed Sheep Meadow. Expect a picnic next time I’m ’round these parts.


Every winter I am so thankful NYC taxis are yellow. The automotive burst of color is often the only thing that gets me through the gray.


This is a baseball field. You’d never guess it. See the snow man in the middle of it? Some one hopped the “Closed for the Season” fence to build that!

Bah-bye winter, 2015. We are never, ever, getting back together. Seriously. Lose my number. If you’re back knocking on my door next week, I’m gonna be hella pissed. Let’s just remember the good times and go our separate ways!

Are you as excited as I am to kiss winter good bye?

About New York Cliche

NYC lifestyle blog by Mary Lane. Events, adventures, epic mistakes, dating, life, humor. A 20-something trying to make it (and make out) in the city of dreams.

2 thoughts on “Winter 2015, We Are Never, Ever Getting Back Together

  1. Ha! Long underwear! Funny, my boyfriend calls them “long sleeved draws” and hates them! Thank goodness its never that cold in the Tropics.
    Hope you don’t have to see that winter again.

  2. Oh NYC, how lovely a city you are…..gorgeous photos! Then again, I’m sitting here in England where our winter has been mild compared to the snowstorms that have battered the North-east US!

    I want to live in NY someday. My goal is to be a university professor – perhaps I might teach at NYU one day…. Meanwhile, your blog provides me with my NY fix. Thank you! 🙂
    Grace @ Cultural Life recently posted…“Solitude is a human presumption”: Barbara Kingsolver’s Prodigal SummerMy Profile

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