I suppose if I was at the maximum for a New York cliché, I would be waiting tables. It’s the ultimate clichéd day job. Thing is, I’m a bit of a klutz and would more than likely spill things. I can’t stand working behind a desk, as you may have read about once or twice. While I’ve recently been making some money acting (don’t worry, I’ll tell you all about it in a following post), that does not happen all the time. So how do I pay my bills? I’ll give you 11 examples:
1 The circus came to Queens. Wanting to take advantage of the fact kids beg their parents for things, I was sent to Highland Park on a lovely sunny day where it was my job to make as many kids as possible look like this→→→→
2 The insane world of bridal that I never before had need to entertain. That is until I promoted a low-calorie yogurt at the New York Bridal Expo. Went home with cases of artificially sweetened strawberry and key-lime yogurt. Not to mention for dinner I ate nothing but naturally sweetened cake samples. Wedding cake is the best.
3 Some events you get paid an inflated amount to just stand around and look friendly. If I was a Nicki Minaj fan, this would have been the best job ever: I promoted a camera at one of her concerts and ended up watching most of the concert because no one wanted to look at cameras while she was performing.
4 Occasionally my day ends at 3AM. When one promotion asked me START my day at 3AM I couldn’t imagine what it was for (often a job is posted with very little detail- like the brand you’ll be promoting). Turns out it was for the Royal Wedding. I was on the job at 4AM handing out free snuggies to the first 50 people to show up for the biggest viewing party in North America. I did very little actual work and basically got paid to watch the Royal Wedding, which I enjoyed far more than I expected to.
5 I may or may not (I signed a contract so I have to say that) be involved in this:
6 Same goes for this:
7 Some events you get paid an inflated amount to just stand around and look friendly. If I was a Nicki Minaj fan, this would have been the best job ever: I promoted a camera at one of her concerts and ended up watching most of the concert because no one wanted to look at cameras while she was performing.
8 The Academy Awards have fallen pray to decreased ratings. As a result, they had a massive promotion this year. The main hook was a photo-op to take a picture of yourself holding an actual Oscar. Some people were beyond enthusiastic about this, dressing up in tuxedos and ball gowns for their one snapshot in the spot light.
9 Some couples choose to have their wedding pictures taken in Times Square. I do not understand why you want to celebrate your union with the backdrop of consumerism. I especially don’t understand these pictures after spending hours wearing a wedding dress myself. An Off-Broadway show decked me out in a full gown and veil and stuck me with fliers by the Mariott Marquee. The result: a horrendously dirty wedding dress (the bottom was grey after mere hours) and my picture in many people’s “Trip to NYC” scrapbooks.
10 New Years Day, 6 hours after puking on Safa Boy’s pants, I hauled my hung-over butt out of bed and took a 90 minute subway ride. From 9am to 3pm in 30° weather, I stood on the boardwalk and passed out samples of lotion to participants of the Coney Island Polar Bear Plunge. Yes, I tried to save the skin of people choosing to jump into frigid water. I was a ridiculous event, fortunately the participants were colorful enough to distract me from nausea.
11 Can’t forget to the events I’ve previously devoted entire posts to: the time I promoted with models, Fashion Week promotions, working at ComicCon, liquor promos (which are the best and best paying), and my original Times Square experience promoting Mary Poppins.
What can I say? I never get bored!