I’m back! Back in the New York blues! Back to the daily grind and the hustle and bustle of NYC cliché after 10 glorious days in California. We hung out at the beach, hiked under giant redwoods, got tipsy in wine country, and biked across the Golden Gate Bridge. It was a fantastic vacation, full of much needed R&R, and the perfect escape from sweltering New York.

Except we didn’t really escape New York! NYC was everywhere I looked, all over the San Francisco Bay Area!

There’s New York Apparel on Haight Street. I was sorely tempted to walk in and say, “Excuse me, I’m the creator of the blog New York Cliche, which basically makes me an NYC expert, and gold glitter bell bottoms and mother-lovin CAT LEGGINGS are basically the OPPOSITE of “New York Apparel”. Change yo name, fools.” 

“Escape from New York Pizza” is also on Haight Street. I remember eating at this place when I was 14 with a boy I had a crush on. I do not remember the pizza, but the New York Pizza Snob I’ve become in the 18 years since is mad confident that eating it would make me want to escape to New York.

Are you ready for this next one?

WE DROVE PAST THE FUCKING CHATEAU DIANA WINE-PRODUCT-ERY!!

Remember my tirade against this infamous NYC “wine product”? Well, while wine tasting in Sonoma, we happened to drive past it. I promise this was not planned! I did not visit the makers of my most hated New York beverage! I just tramped through their flower garden to take a photo with their sign because this coincidence was too, too funny.

Found an art gallery in Fisherman’s Wharf, San Francisco’s ultimate tourist destination, that was full of colorful paintings of the Manhattan Skyline. I am baffled by this, and amused. Do people visit SF in the summer, find it so cold they wish they’d visited NYC instead, and actually leave with expensive art pieces commemorating the Big Apple? (Photography wasn’t allowed in the gallery- thus this scofflaw selfie photo.)

It was super weird to see a Nathan’s Hot Dog in San Francisco. Why would anyone eat a New York cliché in San Francisco, a city so well-known for food! Get a sourdough bread bowl full of chowder instead! I know your children are picky, but In And Out Burger is literally across the street! There’s supposed to be a taco truck on every corner and Mexican food is consistently stellar in California. Nathan’s, I love you in my current town, but stay out of my home town!

All these little New York minutes in California made me laugh. But don’t worry, it wasn’t NYC all the time, not at all. I’ll be sharing more California vacation awesomeness (with no NYC influence!) the rest of this week!