Guest Post: Outrageous NYC Date Ideas

Outrageous New York date ideas that I pretend to hate but would secretly probably love…

Awesome Guest Post by Gwendy Taylor

I’m not much of a romantic person, and really never have been. Don’t get me wrong—I believe in being sweet and finding your own unique way to “be in love”. But I don’t need an expensive dinner (I’m totes fine with cooking at home) or fancy gifts (I mean, if the sentiment is there, I’m all in—regardless of price). However, since I’m not one for absolutes, here are a few NYC date ideas that blow my ideals about mushy-ass romance out of the water.

1.     Vodka martini, on the rock

First, let’s be clear—I’m always down for a date when drinks are involved. Alcohol makes every awkward social situation at the very least bearable and at best Academy Award worthy. But a $10,000 to $15,000 dollar cocktail?  Bitch, please! A diamond in the bottom of a glass is clearly a choking hazard! I mean really, who would want to find an enormous chunk of bling waiting expectantly for them in the bottom of their martini (silently raises hand…).

Fact: I cannot drink out of a martini glass without spilling. One spill = $1,000 down my dress.

2.     Fine Dining

We’ve basically already covered my thoughts on eating expensive meals at restaurants (in case you missed it, I’m pro home-cooked dinner dates). But, let’s be honest—it’s incredibly terrifying to think about going over to a complete stranger’s place for dinner (Hannibal Lecter, anybody??). Enter: my exception to the “let’s not eat out let’s just stay in and drink wine and cook” rule. A good burger holds the key to my heart. A $295.00 Le Burger Extravagant would basically own all of me. Forever. #bae

With that price tag, you eat better eat that burger like you’re in a Carl’s Jr commercial.

3.     Save room for dessert

Dessert is usually my favorite part of any meal (including snacks that technically aren’t meals, but open the door for dessert anyway). Virtually nothing gets between me and my chocolate. Or ice cream. Or cake (this world needs more cake). Or…flakes of 24-carat gold? I mean, if you twisted my arm into it, I’m sure I could find a way to vigorously shovel copious amounts of gold covered almonds, Tahitian vanilla bean ice cream, and Grand Passion Caviar into my face.

This sundae is basically a golden idol, so praying to it kinda makes sense.

4.     A heli good time

I’ll spare everybody the Fifty-too-many Shades of Grey reference here, but suffice to say; very few of us just-making-it-by middle class folks can afford a helicopter in any capacity (unless maybe it’s an R/C copter). If a date wanted to literally sweep me off of my feet and roughly a million miles (math has never been my strong suit, but I think I nailed the calculations here) into the air for a fresh perspective on New York Harbor, I’d oblige. Who knows, it could be the best 20 minutes of the entire date…

Take me on a helicopter ride and you’ll get luckier than this guy.

5.     You could probably find me in the club

I ultimately claim responsibility for none of my actions when I go to a club. After a few cocktails, I feel like I can achieve Dancing with the Stars status on every dance move ever, including (but not limited to): twerking, the Carlton, and my own version of the Melbourne Shuffle. That being said, this is why I can’t have nice things—at least when it comes to super exclusive nightclubs. Nobody really needs to pay thousands of dollars to embarrass themselves. But I mean, if my date is comfortable paying for expensive drinks until even he thinks I have moves like Swayze, I’m not mad at it…

If it’s JT and Andy Samberg embarrassing themselves, I’m so in.

 

 Gwendy Taylor is pretty sure she’d be the real MVP if being socially awkward was an enviable trait. She’s a wife and mother who struggles with a shameless addiction to Trivia Crack.

FYI, in case any fellas out there are interested, I’d totally prefer the helicopter ride over all the others…

Wasn’t this an awesome guest post? Thanks so much, Gwendy! If any of you have been on a date anything like any of these you MUST let us know! I want to hear all about it!

If you are interested in writing an awesome guest post for New York Cliché, I’d love that! Email me at newyorkcliche@yahoo.com

About New York Cliche

NYC lifestyle blog by Mary Lane. Events, adventures, epic mistakes, dating, life, humor. A 20-something trying to make it (and make out) in the city of dreams.

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