Sorry Folks, I’m No Tinderella: Opting Out of the Tinder Craze

Saturday night I found myself at a bar in the midst of a boys’ night. I can hold my own in a group of men. Yes, I can.

Even when they’re all inebriated.
Just don’t expect me to go drink for drink. I’ll black out before they’re even buzzed.

Even when they’re all attractive.
Just don’t expect me to have crushes on all of them. I’ll pick my favorite, the (most ruggedly handsome) one who makes me laugh, thanks.

“I have a question for you. You have to answer honestly,” asked a guy whose name I had just painfully mispronounced.

I can hold my own, but when they start asking pointed questions, my stomach dips. Oh no, please not a question about threesomes. Please not something that’s going to make me roll my eyes or turn my face bright pink.

“Okay…” I said.

“Are you on Tinder?” 

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Ha! That’s a good question! I’m not rolling my eyes or blushing!

“Nope.” I laughed, answering honestly, “No, I am not. Not on Tinder.”

He squinted at me, “I don’t believe you.”

I laughed again. I wouldn’t believe me either, Friend-of-Boy-I-Have-a-Big-Ol’-Crush-On!

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Every millennial and their roommate is on Tinder. The dating app has exploded into a cultural phenomenon, especially in New York City. How can I call myself a NYC blogger, who frequently writes about dating no less, and not be on Tinder? Do I owe it to my audience to be on this dating app? Tell me, dear reader, are you terribly disappointed I haven’t downloaded this app? Does the absence of Tinder in my life go so far as to discredit me as a New York Cliché?? PERISH THE THOUGHT!

I strongly considered joining Tinder. For you guys. For the sake of my NYC reputation. For everything this blog stands for.

It was with that last thought that I realized I couldn’t join Tinder; because doing so actually goes against something this blog stands for.

I won’t manipulate my life for the sake of writing about it. I’ve had that questioned a lot recently in light of a certain rom-com worthy first date. I’ve never consciously altered my behavior for the sake of a story. I never, ever have and I never, ever will manipulate other people so I have something to write about. I will say blogging has motivated me to do things I might not have otherwise, like attend a Jazz Age Lawn Party or haul my ass out of bed to go see the sunrise over Coney Island. I’m living my life and writing about the interesting parts. I’m not creating a life to write about. Honesty is always at the heart of New York Cliché.

Maybe someday I’ll want to join, for more of a reason than just to write about it. For now, meeting in the non-virtual, real world seems to be working just fine. Besides, you don’t need me! There’s no shortage of other bloggers and artists talking about Tinder!

You can check out photographer Kirra Cheers who photographed a series of her Tinder dates, with their permission, and turned her dating escapades into an artistic exhibition.

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You can check out the blog Five Years and Finally Single. She writes about Tinder a lot, this post in particular Top 10 Tinder Moments is great.

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From her blog I also learned about Jarrod Allen, AKA TinderFella who satirizes (or openly mocks?) pictures of women he sees on Tinder.

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 Tinderella NYC is a blog that chronicles New York City Tinder dates with the tagline: A Modern Girl’s Search For An Old-Fashioned Prince Charming.

“Tinderella” is a word that caught on after this hilarious College Humor video-

More in the Disney vain from College Humor, here’s What if Disney Princesses Met Their Princes on Tinder?

Then there’s the delightful Straight White Boys Texting which is always funny and often features ridiculously awful Tinder messages.

If you just want an article about what Tinder is and how much it’s exploded in the past year, GQ wrote a great and very thorough article, Love Me Tinder.

What are your thoughts on Tinder? Are you on it? Do you love reading people’s cringe-worthy experiences? Have you heard any great experiences? Want to try to convince me to join?

About New York Cliche

NYC lifestyle blog by Mary Lane. Events, adventures, epic mistakes, dating, life, humor. A 20-something trying to make it (and make out) in the city of dreams.

9 thoughts on “Sorry Folks, I’m No Tinderella: Opting Out of the Tinder Craze

  1. I’ve heard of tinder but never used it (I’m married lol) if I was single id probably use it bc I’m so shy and it may be easier to meet someone.. Or weird..and creepy.. Haha! That’s great you don’t have to use it and can meet guys in “real life!” 😉

  2. Maybe it’s the combo of LA, Tinder and this weird Facebook cult for girls that constantly exposes the worst that LA has to offer, but I strongly associate Tinder with *people that I just don’t want to be like. So I never used it. It just seems like a more efficient way to meet fuckboys.

    *I know ONE successful couple from Tinder. So it’s not all bad.

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