So yesterday was April Fools Day. How long did it take you to realize? Everyone got pregnant, some went to jail, many quit their jobs, some landed incredible opportunities. What was the best prank you saw? The internet makes pulling pranks SO easy. With a free pass on April 1st, it’s hard to resist. As someone with a weakness for entertaining and posting my life all over the internet, I knew I had to do something. I considered writing a prank blog post, but it felt wrong- honesty is crucial to everything I write here. Instead, I turned to Facebook- rarely my social network of choice.
Remember I wrote that blog post about how my buddy Walter and I are just friends? That we are never going to end up together like the media, our friends, and cliché expects? No? Then read it here. “Walter” is his pseudonym, he’s better known as Tyson. For 23 hours yesterday, Tyson and I were in a relationship. According to Facebook anyway. We went “Facebook Official” – you know that means it was serious.
Our relationship went live at 12:23AM EST on April 1st.
It was early enough that no one realized it was April Fools Day. Early enough that Facebook time-stamped the event as happening on March 31st. “Do you think anyone will actually fall for this?” I texted Tyson. I doubted anyone would, but figured it would be funny regardless.
Turns out, everyone believed it. I’ve never been “Facebook Official” with anyone before. Yesterday I quickly learned such an announcement gets a huge amount of attention. All morning I was getting comments left and right, even direct messages: “Congratulations!” “So happy for you two!” “He’s cute! You have to tell me the story!” “Blog post. STAT.”
By afternoon, Ty and I were feeling guilty. The people who saw it for the silly prank is was were in the minority. So we decided to make it as obvious as possible that we were fooling around. April fooling around! What followed is what happens when two best friends (who used to perform improv together) attempt to embody and satirize:
The Worst Things Couples Do on Facebook
From the Beginning to the End of a Relationship
The Why-Are-You-Putting-This-For-The-World-To-See?? Status
The This-Should-Be-Sent-As-A-PRIVATE-TEXT Status
The Seriously-No-Body-Cares-But-You Status
The I’m-So-Desperate-to-Prove-My-Love-That-It-Makes-My-Relationship-Suspect Status
The You-Guys-Are-Gross Status
The This-Is-More-PDA-Than-If-You-Were-Making-Out-On-the-Subway Status
The You-Just-Made-Me-Throw-Up-In-My-Mouth Status
By that point, it was really obvious we were fools making fun of the whole thing. Our friends even started to get into the joke.
That’s when we knew we had to break up. In the best worst-possible-most-public-over-sharing-inappropriate way.
He started it.
Like I was gonna stand for that!
OH NO HE DIDN’T!
Can I get an amen (and a spell-check on “somebody”)?
At this point we needed a musical interlude.
Then moved on as quickly as we began.
We had a good run. It was fun while it lasted. Tyson, I’ll always remember you fondly. As the best April Fools prank partner ever! Yeah, we crack ourselves up, hope we made you laugh too. Nah, that doesn’t mean we should maybe just give it a try at actually being a couple.