Of course the minute I get used to having a boyfriend is the minute my relationship falls apart. That’s my life, why do I expect otherwise? I am Carrie Bradshaw (with smaller boobs): strutting down Park Avenue, feeling fabulous, when a crosstown bus hits a puddle. A plume of the city’s dirtiest water splashes my outfit turning gorgeous to gross.
Suddenly, I’m single again. And you know what? I’m freaking awesome single. Arguably more so than when attached
at least to someone who doesn’t deserve me. Not only that, I love being single. Really, I do. It’s comfortable, it’s what I’m accustomed to. Which is a little boring, but I sure learned some valuable lessons in my coupled stint (yep, totally calling it that). So look out NYC, I’m back on the prowl: a little wiser, a little more sexy, a little smarter. Damn, what a stellar combination if you’ll pardon the horn tooting.
What am I looking forward to most about being single?
1. High heels
It’s still warm enough to get good mileage out of my pairs of 4 inch strappy sandals. The poor little darlings have been sitting in my closet all summer, hidden away because I didn’t want to tower over a boyfriend who is actually 5’9 but thinks he is 5’11. Lame, I know. Now I’m going to get a pedicure, pair them with my skinny jeans, and strut down the city streets. I figure I’ll have about 30 minutes before a bus hits me or I fall flat on my face. So worth it, I can’t wait.
2. My next kiss
I don’t know when it will be, I don’t know who it’s coming from. I don’t know if it will be swoon worthy or make me want to unlock lips faster than I can say “bleh”. I don’t know if it’ll be a peck or a full on teenage-level make-out sesh. I don’t know if I’ll ever kiss the person again. I don’t know if I’ll be drunk or sober (though my money is on the former). Also, I love the moments before a first kiss. Anticipation, butterflies, wondering if he’s actually going to go for it, hopefully hoping he does. There’s no other feeling like it and I’ve missed it for months. The possibilities are endless, save one: there is no chance my next kiss will end in beard-burn from a disappointing I-don’t-give-a-shit beard! That’s over!
3. Going out dancing with my girls
It’s either dancing or Ben and Jerry’s and I choose dancing! For the first time in the history of us living together, my roommates and I will all be single at the same time. It’s now shameful we have never been out dancing together. SHAMEFUL. So I am pulling the “I just got dumped” card and demanding we all go out. Clubbing, the works: aforementioned 4 inch heels, questionably short dresses, and we’re not leaving the house until 10PM. Will.I.Am’s “Scream & Shout” our theme song, boys will buy us drinks, we’ll dance until our makeup sweats off. Birds better be chirping as we
stumble walk home.
4. Planning no dates
I am great at planning dates. I like planning dates. But holy hell I am so sick of planning them! Harry was crap at planning, never creative about it, and really didn’t try very hard. The excuse that you’re new to NYC doesn’t last long. I am so looking forward to planning nothing but what outfit to wear for my next date. I will orchestrate awesome outings with my friends. Dates, the ball is in your court. Be a man and come up with something better than dinner and a movie.
5. Focusing on my career
No, this was not one of the break-up clichés he used. Thank god, this one is almost as bad as “It’s not you it’s me.” I planned to do this, even when I thought I’d be in relationship (because I believe it’s totally possible to be in a relationship and focus on other things too. Whoa, I know). Now, I get to take advantage of Rejection Motivation. Call it a perk of getting dumped; it kicks you in the pants, motivates you out of complacency, forces you to reevaluate. I need to figure out what I’m doing with my life and do it like I never have before. Balls to the wall, foot on the floor, full speed ahead, go big or go home!
Surprise: struggling with a relationship that is starting to make you miserable is not conducive to self-motivated creativity. I found it difficult to blog once a week this summer. More often than not, writing wasn’t fun, rather something I had to do. Now it’s a different world. My mind is bursting with creative energy! I have so much I want to say, perhaps because I no longer have that one person I tell everything. I like to think it’s more I want to become a better writer, share my experiences, and really explore the potential of this blog. Potential is there, I know it is. Back-to-school time feels like the perfect time for such a focus. After Labor Day expect more posts, maybe some new ideas, maybe some new design. Let’s see where I take it!
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Lastly, a great thanks for all the comments regarding my previous break-up post. You readers are the best. ♥