When the Reality of Growing Old Alone Knocks on Your Door

Her tiny, diminutive form slipped out the door of her apartment and into the hallway. In the prime of bone density, she might have claimed the height of 5 foot (in shoes). Time and osteoporosis (or something of that ilk) whittled her away to a size that put her, uh, well, approximately at eye level with my breasts. This, combined with the worry that even abysmal upper body strength could crush her, made the hug she gave me the first day I was back especially awkward. 

Her Cinderella-sized feet padded down the carpeted hallway, coming to a stop just outside my parents’ door. One hand clutched into a bony fist, poised to knock, the other hand wrapped tightly around a jar. A new jar every night. A jar for every day of the week. Today perhaps of tomato sauce, tomorrow perhaps of apple sauce, maybe Wednesday would be olives. 

She knocked on the door and waited. Could she sense the feeling of annoyance from those of us behind the door? Could she hear the audible sigh from my father who had just finished making dinner? Who had only a minute before finally sat down to enjoy a meal with his family? No, no, of course she couldn’t, I tell myself, hoping beyond hope that’s the truth.  Read More

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New York and San Francisco: Bicoastal Polyamory is Totally Cool

Yesterday I returned to New York from a seaside vacation in a quaint coastal town.

By that I mean I was home for the holidays in San Francisco. Yes, San Francisco is where I was born and raised for the first 18 years of my life. When ever I tell anyone this, the invariable response is, “Why would you ever want to leave California??”

This is the time of year I have trouble answering the question. Only mole people prefer New York in January to sunny California.

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15 Blog Posts from 2015 that I’m Proud of, Damn It

Holy shit it’s 2016. Good-bye holiday season, good-bye 2015, hello January. Last week was supposed to be for reflecting on the year but I spent it gallivanting around my home town San Francisco. So here it is, the first Monday of 2016, (and actually Tuesday by the time I publish it). Instead of writing a blogger cliché post about New Year’s Resolutions (oh, that’ll come), I’m writing one reflecting on my best year yet of blogging.

Best year ever! Woot! I wrote over 100 blog posts- that’s a first! With that many posts, you might think it’d be hard to pick my favorites. Nah. It was easy.

My Favorite Blog Posts of 2015

1) 

First time I ever used cat gifs in a post. Brilliant. Should’ve been doing it for years. Read More

His Kiss Felt Like a Dementor’s

It’s a cliché that the holidays are the worst time of year to be single. I’m feeling that cliché more this year than ever before. Maybe because at 29 my Facebook feed feels like it’s exclusively engagement announcements. Maybe because I have more than a handful of friends who are happily married, several expecting babies. Maybe because this year, sleeping alone in my childhood bed on Christmas Eve felt colder than ever before.

Maybe because I’m actively trying not to be single and having no success.

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Guest NYC: My Parent’s Secret Christmas Eve Tradition

Because of the season, I thought it might be fun to share more stories of Christmas than just my own. Here’s a lovely story of Christmas Eve from my friend Jen. (If you’re anything like me, the end will make you tear up in the best of ways.)

Christmas Eve is my favorite day of the year.  There is something about the anticipation of the next day combined with the traditions of the day itself that just clicks.  

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Guest NYC: The Year I Got a BFF for Christmas

Because of the season, I thought it might be fun to share more stories of NYC Christmas than just my own. Here’s a lovely story of friendship from my darling roommate

Making new friends is a weird, sort of uncomfortable challenge for a lot of people. Me, I talk too much (especially about Harry Potter) and expect people to get my humor immediately. But a whole lot of Christmas magic makes things much easier. Turns out all it takes is a whirlwind, twinkle-light, carol-filled adventure to give you that one person- who compliments all of your best and worst qualities and does planks and wall sit exercises with you over FaceTime (and gets just as excited about the newest “Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them” trailer as you do).

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Let’s go back to December of 2009. Read More