My senior year of college, I went to the gym almost every single day. It was a final attempt to shed the cliché Freshman 15 I’d maintained since my first semester. I memorized lines on the elliptical, read novels for my English Lit class while jogging on the treadmill.

After seeing an article in SHAPE about the importance of muscle to weight loss, I even ventured downstairs to the intimidating weight area. There, the male to female ratio was the opposite of my theatre classes. I PUMPED IRON next to cute boys whose sporting events I never attended.

Nothing worked. My clothes fit the same and the number on the scale barely budged. 

My plan was to move to NYC immediately after graduation to pursue a career in theatre. I couldn’t resist those New York Cliché dreams of Broadway! But I’d tried my best to prepare and failed – I was worried I’d be passed over for roles because of my weight.

I moved to New York City in May, hit the sweltering pavement, and the weight melted right off. Without even trying, by the end of that first summer I fit into jeans that had barely fit me in high school.

Every time people commented on my weight loss, I’d joke about writing a diet book, “It’ll be the next South Beach! I’ll call it New York Broke!” The secret to the New York Broke Diet is simple: move to New York with no money but all the dreams! Then follow these fun easy steps:
1. Spend 3 hours a day commuting
2. Run around between multiple jobs so much that you forget to eat
3. Only eat what you pack in your bag for the day (supplemented by dollar slices)
4. For fun, go on walks. They are free and you can’t afford anything else (besides dates where boys pay for everything)

There is zero scientific evidence backing this up but, hey, it worked for me!

Ten years later, I’m still the same weight. This city notoriously kicks asses, which has helped mine stay pert. Never have I ever joined a gym in my decade in this town. So how do I stay fit?

No, Carrie Bradshaw, shopping is not my cardio.

This is my cardio:

♦Constantly running to make up time because the MTA is ALWAYS late. ALWAYS.

♦Pacing the subway platform because I’m antsy because the MTA is ALWAYS late. ALWAYS.

♦Taking CitiBike to avoid the MTA as much as possible.

♦Living in a 5th floor walk up.

For strength training, my Trader Joe’s obsession has me pretty much covered. Carrying two massive grocery bags between boroughs is more satisfying than any kettlebell routine I can possibly imagine.

That is my New York City Fitness Routine. It all goes to hell if the MTA ever gets its shit together!