A Mother’s Day dating story for your reading pleasure…

It seemed like a mutual fade out. We’d been dating about two months, I hadn’t heard from him in over a week. This was fine by me. Oh sure, he was a good-looking and very sweet guy. I just wasn’t that into him, as they say. I remember rolling my eyes every time I was with him. He took himself far too seriously. Besides, he never fully redeemed himself after not having the balls to kiss me first (read other posts I wrote about this guy here and here).

When my phone buzzed that Sunday afternoon and I saw it was him, I rolled my eyes. Dammit! Why is he texting me? I thought we were both on the same this-isn’t-going-any-where page! Ugh. I hoped we were mutually escaping the awkward break-up conversation.

I read his text and found myself faced with an urgent moral dilemma.

“Hey we just won the Matilda lottery and have an extra ticket! Are you free at 3 and want to go?”

Yes! I really, really wanted to see Matilda on Broadway! I’d wanted to see it for months! I was free at 3 and had just enough time to make it to the theater! Yes!

I really wanted to see Matilda…. But the guy offering me the ticket….not so much.

Am I a terrible person if I accept this offer while knowing there’s not future with this guy? I mean, that is pretty shitty…. Hey, maybe I’m being to harsh. He is a really nice guy. Ya know, part of my problem with him is he never invites me on interesting dates…Here he is inviting me! Yes! Maybe I can keep dating him! Yes! Then I can see Matilda and not feel guilty! Hooray!

I managed to convince myself it was perfectly fine to accept the ticket. So I called him, Yes! I want to go! Thank you! Where are we meeting! ETC! “Great,” he said and then informed me that the “we” he had spoken of in his text, the “WE” who won the ticket lottery was him and his mother. He was seeing this play with HIS MOTHER. But wait, it gets better!

This Sunday wasn’t just any Sunday, IT WAS MOTHER’S DAY.

It was Mother’s Day and the boy I’d been dating two months (who I hadn’t actually seen in over two weeks) invited me to join his Mother’s Day activity with him AND HIS MOM. I tried to back out but it was too late. I’d already told him I was free, already told him I was dying to see the show and that he was so sweet to invite me. I was stuck.

I gave myself a pep-talk on the subway ride to the theater. This is going to be super awkward but you can handle it. You can, ML, I know you can! Okay, be cordial to his mom but distant. Seriously, parents always love you, but you can’t let that happen this time! If she falls in love with you she’ll be sad when you break up with him! Wait dude, you convinced yourself you wanted to keep seeing him…remember? Shit. OMG I’M A TERRIBLE PERSON WHY AM I DOING THIS!?

But did I back out? Nope. Guess I really, really wanted to see Matilda. I mean, it was a fun play but in hindsight I’m not sure it was worth it.

Here’s the funny thing (as if this whole situation isn’t one massive funny thing), I actually managed to avoid meeting his mom! I ran up to the theater at 2:58PM, he dashed out to give me my ticket, and we dashed back to our seats. His mom was no where in sight.

The tickets weren’t together, I learned, they were pairs of two. The two we were sitting in and then the other two on the opposite side of the theater. So he was sitting with me while his mom was sitting with one of his friends on the opposite side of the theater. It was Mother’s Day and he sat with some girl (me) instead of his own mother.

When the show ended I left immediately. I claimed dinner plans with a family friend but that was a lie… I just wanted to run out of that theater as fast as I could before his mom could even get out of her seat.

That was the last I ever saw him. Choosing to sit with some girl you’re sort of dating instead of your own mother ON MOTHER’S DAY? DEAL BREAKER. Gentlemen, I hope you learn a valuable lesson from my story: treat your mama well this Mother’s Day (this Sunday, don’t forget!)!

On a different note: the musical Matilda is an absolute delight. It’s the perfect show to bring your mother to or your entire family. Even a date, although there are better shows for that! All the gifs, as you’ve probably guessed, are from the show!